Police Beat

Stone drunk and stupid

A motorcyclist bit off more than he could chew when pulled over for driving under the influence, according to an Oro Valley Police Department report. According to the narrative, the man was pulled over after speeding through Oro Valley, weaving through the lanes of northbound North Oracle Road and varying his speed. 

The man failed his walk-and-turn test, stopping before its completion and telling the officers, “I’m F***ed up! Just arrest me,” according to the report. That’s exactly what happened, as the suspect was booked into Pima County Jail. 

He didn’t go gently into the good night of Sunday, May 13, though, refusing to consent to a blood test, telling the officers, “F*** (Magistrate) Judge Dunscomb, f**** the Government, and f*** you!” according to the report. 

Wasted at CDO

A Canyon del Oro High School student had a rough morning on Monday, May 14 after school officials noticed her rather obvious intoxication, according to an OVPD report.

The student was sent to the school’s office after the school’s assistant principal noticed a strong scent of alcohol on her breath, which the responding officer noted. 

According to the report, the young woman had red, watery and bloodshot eyes and admitted to the officer that she was under the influence of alcohol. She blew a .117 on the department breathalyzer, resulting in her arrest for unlawful consumption of spiritous alcohol. She was released to her legal guardian. 

The student didn’t tell the officer what she was drinking, but that she had consumed alcoholic beverages after arriving to school at 7:30 a.m., the report said.

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